As someone who aspires to be a dreamer and a go-getter, life is not always that easy. I have dreams and some people might say i have a lot of them. Carving your own path in the world is not always easy, most people lose faith before they even begin.

I am trying to start my own fashion line and it hasn’t been easy. Sometimes i feel like I’ve got everything down to the T, and most times i feel like i’m making it up as i go along. The problem is i want to do things differently in the fashion world and that starts with drawing less torques,way less of those.

I wanna be creative start small and simple then work my way up. It is currently summer in South Africa and that means more flesh less clothes, which is good for buying Fabric too. I’ve decided to go with real life models but petite girls still.

So from a distant hope and potential still live here and so far it seems possible. There is though the question of start up capital. I quit my job because i couldn’t stand not being able to afford a living, but now i wont’t be able to start this business off the ground.

Well now i guess the heading doesn’t fit the story, i do have hope that everything will work out. But we live in a world where starting a business is for people with a lot of money or a lot of education. Funny story i know a black business man who had neither but currently owns Paarl’s most thriving black owned businesses. It’s not having hope that kills dreams, but being told that there is a specific way to do things in order to make your dreams come true.

So there is no such thing as false hope because when you have it hope will get you where you need to go. Even if taking the road less traveled seems hopeless, if you have hope it will push you to the end of your path.

It is literally day 2 and that picture you see is the result of trying without any guidelines. I thought I’d draw my first model without any help and in that way I could look back to see whether I have improved or not.

So I then went on to the only site where you can find a video tutorial on basically anything, YouTube. I found a lot of videos with different ways of drawing a 9 headed model, and they sure made it look easy. The problem is I’m no good at drawing neither am I any good with measurements. It’s only been two days but I still feel like I am right where I began. Which begs the question where did I begin?

A couple of weeks ago I was looking at a dress in a store opposite where I work, oh I have a 9 to 5 job 6 days a week. Anyway the pattern on the fabric of the dress gave me a light bulb moment. I imagined my first design and it was brilliant. I shared with a few of my colleagues and they also thought it was good. In that moment I thought I could make it as a fashion designer. But that dream is slowly fading into dust since I am struggling to draw a simple 9 head model.

This is my 100th try from different videos with different designers. Which made me think do I have to be able to draw this in order for me to design clothes? I am a more creative person by imagination, but could I be a designer if I can’t draw? What makes a designer unique to others?

I am known to spread myself too thin when it comes to my dreams but this is one dream I am not letting go.